Moscow, 23 pm.
We take metro, my station is the last one, so I farewell my friends in the half way. As I get to the final point I try to get through my relative who is supposed to meet me at the metro exit. But I’m out of coverage, so I can’t call her. As I reach the final steps of the underground I notice a group of young Russians at the exit. My phone still refuses to work.
“It’s dangerous, never walk alone in Russia” as I remember people’s advice to me. I’m well aware of the innocent deaths of many Armenians (mentioning the last case and the ones I blogged about in the past). I want to chicken, but I also have to walk some 500 meters alone. I gather my black hair and cover with my hat, round the scarf over my mouth, put the cell-phone into my pocket, clench my fists ready for hitting if anything, and do my fastest and biggest steps ever in my life. Don’t ever remember me dreading so much. As I walked, I tried to peep back to make sure that no one follows me. When I turn to the corner my phone works and I call my relative asking her to open the door. “What? You are downstairs?”,- she utters.
Then I hear her voice coming from the balcony, “Zara…”. “Yes, I’m here, open the door”.
As I enter the room she runs to me with a horrified face: “Never, never, never do it again? Do you understand how dangerous it is to walk alone at night?!! I called your name from the balcony because I saw a man standing behind you, I thought he was following you”. I calmed her down and embraced, “You wouldn’t like me to wait at the metro with those young people around, would you?” We both laughed, though I was trying to conceal my fright. Thanks God I was safe and sound!
Am imagining people living there with fear in their hearts, fear for their children, with fear that they may be killed one day by a group of nationalists. With fear that one day their children might not come back from school and later their bodies will be found with nationalistic laces around their necks…
It is not a life… It’s a nightmare… When is the sunrise?